Okay personal prayer.
I have been working diligently on expanding my view and working towards experiencing the power of personal prayer. My prayers have always been answered, I will start with that. Weather it’s timely or not (in my opinion) I am always blessed constantly with the answers to my hearts desires and needs. Through faith I have found that patience is the key’ to this for me. I am NOT patient AT ALL so, this has been extra hard for me to practice’. Those answers have also always happened indirectly, and have basically been a series of events that have led to the grateful answer to a prayer. I am not saying that I hold anything against the way the Lord works, for he is perfect and I believe everything happens in his timing and for reasons we will not always understand. BUT, I have always wanted, hoped for, and prayed for matter a factly a distinct premonition from our heavenly father. I’ve always wanted that personal piece of a miracle, that uncanny, unquestionable, DIRECT line to heaven. Greedy I know…I can’t help my desires. They are true; I know miracles are constant in my life though. Jack is a living miracle on his own. I see heaven in him everyday.
Well, I had a predicament come up just recently. I was handed an opportunity to start nursing school THIS May! Wow, I mean wow...this is MY DREAM! I worked for this, I deserve this! Well, I had my interview today. It went AMAZING! I was just drooling over the school, the curriculum, and the fact that I would be working in Labor and Deliver with LIVE women having LIVE babies. I was basically a kid in a candy shop by the end of the tour and interview. Plus, I also would be bettering my family’s situation, Chris could quit his job in 18 months and I could support the family so HE could focus on school! So many scenarios and ideas where already cementing themselves into my brain. That is until I LEFT the college…and a distinct knot started to form in my stomach. The doubt and worry started to settle in everywhere and I started to have second thoughts about leaving S.L.C.C before completion. How could every piece seem to fit perfectly into my future and make me sick? That is when I prayed. I prayed to my heavenly father to help me make sense of this, I prayed out loud the entire drive home. I told him basically this decision couldn’t come over time. I needed to know now, and I would do WHATEVER he told me to do. Kinda direct right? I know…Well the bad feelings started to melt away so I headed to visit my sissy at the U of U hospital. I had to restrain myself from ambushing every nurse with questions of advice, for some reason I didn’t feel right about talking to these perfect strangers, and that is very not like me. Well, during my visit I had to take a stroll to the break room to heat up Jack’s dinner. I met a nice janitor there who was cleaning and going about his work. He asked me “How’s your day going?” a perfectly simple question to ask a stranger, but I felt the need to spill every event of my day with him. AND I DID! My worries about this nursing school, me being tired and worn out, etc. He was just so nice, and so calm and thoughtful, he said things like, “You just can’t ever stop.” And “You have to just keep going.” Things I feel the Lord would tell me himself. Then we got into the discussion of nursing schools, He then confided in ME about the school I had chosen and his aprehensions on ones he had considered. Wait, this most likely 50 year old man and I are both working towards our RN, what a coincidence! He also shocked me when he said that he had been attending S.L.C.C and was just tired of being on the waiting list. I’m thinking in my head, “Come on those are my thoughts exactly!” The last thing I remember though was him saying. “I guess I will just continue to wait and finish at S.L.C.C because it’s the right thing to do.” It wasn’t until later when I was talking to my mom and relaying this strange scenario to her that it HIT ME! I was given my answer, CLEAR AS DAY! I basically had a conversation with God through this sweet old man. I felt that power of a prayer answered rush over me and the emotion was just marvelous. He was of such great comfort to me and he will never know how truly grateful I am that he was a tool in the efforts to answer my prayers. I am so grateful to have had this expieriece and to feel 100% about turning down this opportunity. Hard decisions are best made with the Lords help. I’m just marveling that I get to write this in MY journal and share it with all of you J Pretty cool huh?
